Let’s get right to the point. Yelling gets you nowhere. It actually indirectly teaches the one being yelled at that it is OK to yell. There are other ways to get your point across! Here are some useful positive parenting tips.
Your little one comes home and is all out of sorts. Whether it is a classmate that stole their favorite pencil or a kid on the playground that took their swing, the most important thing you need to initially do is validate their feelings.
If my little ones come home in a tizzy, first I have them explain what happened. Sometimes hashing it out verbally helps them to relax a bit. I then always make sure to validate their feelings of hurt, anger, or sadness.
Depending on their age, determine the best way to explain why he or she may be right or wrong. As my boys have gotten older it has been easier to explain.
It’s super important that the little ones have clear expectations as to what is right and wrong. Obviously age plays a huge part in what is understood, so I took that into consideration with each of the boys.
Explain the consequences in an age-level manner that will not allow for gray areas. My boys know that if they do not do their homework, then they get time taken away from their free-time (usually time on electronics).
CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES
There are times I go through the house and all of the lights are left on, there’s clothing all over the floor, homework hasn’t been done, and someone didn’t flush.
It’s these scenarios when I need to choose my battle. The fact that homework is due and has not been completed comes first. Once the homework has completed, I inch down the list until it is complete.
TIME OUTS AREN’T “IN” ANYMORE
I’ve tried time and time again with the whole “time out” option. It does not work for my kids. Well, at first it did, but then one day I sent my son into time out. He went into time out, but then started singing and actually having a fun time.
Deep breathing could help to both the parent and the child.
Before I jump to any conclusions, I seriously take a deep breath and then assess the situation. It clears my mind and allows me to better handle whatever comes my way.
If one of my boys comes to me upset, I first ask them to take a deep breath. Aside from making them breathe when more than likely they are all up in arms, it gives them a minute to collect their thought.
I look to my fellow mamas for advice all the time when it comes to rearing my boys properly, and I hope this article helps you!
You can read more from Dana on her blog, Pellerini.